


Numb to the Hands of a Mirror

by TheMcShipper



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Gender Dysphoria, M/M, Trans Michael, post squip, super short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-25
Updated: 2017-05-25
Packaged: 2018-11-04 22:55:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11000730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMcShipper/pseuds/TheMcShipper
Summary: *projects heavily onto a fictional character*Pretty much what it says in the tags, y'all. Hope you enjoy!





	Numb to the Hands of a Mirror

The bathroom in the basement is cold at all times. Michael would know, since he hasn't moved from the room since around 12:30.

Everytime he looked in the mirror, someone else was looking back. The idealized version of himself had a flat chest, a deep laugh, a square face, and was tall and handsome. This one? This one was a reasonable height, but not tall, had a round face, some sort of high pit he'd giggle, and the only manly quality about him was his short black hair.

It's 2:03 now, as the screen in front of him reported. There was a single new message, and to his relief, it was his boyfriend, Jeremy. He was asking if Michael was alright since he wasn't at school that day. Michael's heart fluttered with joy at the reminder that someone cared about him. He was interrupted by the sound of the phone ringing.

"Hullo?" He answered, purposefully lowering his voice.

"Michael?" Jeremy's voice was concerned but strong, "Hey, you seem distant lately. What's up?"

"I--" Michael thought for a moment, looked down at the makeshift binder wrapping his chest, and decided not to explain this over the phone, "Can't you just come over?"

"Uh huh, be there as soon as possible. Where are you?" He asked.

Michael looked around nervously, "Well, I haven't moved from the downstairs bathroom for a little more than an hour, but by the time you get here, I'll probably be in the basement." _And hopefully have a shirt on..._

"Okay, see you there," Jeremy hung up before he could respond. He put his head in his arms and groaned. _Why did I do that?_

Lifting himself up from the floor, he slumped out the bathroom and under the covers of his bed. All energy he had to put on something other than two sports bras and boxers was spent on hating everything.

Except...

"Michael?" There was a gentle knock at his door, before Jeremy walked in, "Your brother let me in... what's up? Yesterday you didn't talk to anybody and today you were just... gone."

He sat down on the bed next to the curled up lump under the blankets, "It's just... dysphoria. You know."

"Oh," he sounded like this was expected, "What kind?"

Michael considered this for a moment, getting his thoughts in order, "Voice, my curves, and social, mostly."

"Social? Did something happen?" Michael looked out of the covers and met Jeremy's star filled brown eyes.

"It's just that... people at school won't stop staring at me everytime I talk. The guys all refer to me as the 'only girl in the group' and the girls all ignore me whenever I say anything," Michael explained. There was a moment of silence, "It's stupid, I know--"

"How long has this been going on?" Jeremy was quiet. He looked straight at him, looking dissapointed? No, just sad.

"Several months. I thought I could handle it, but when you left too, I was so alone that I started to notice," Michael's tone was also soft, "I've been the rock this entire time, now I'm not sure if I'm even a pebble.

"That's alright."

"To you..." Michael mumbled, "What can I do?"

Jeremy looked around, not understanding what to say. He clearly wanted to say something, just not sure what. Finally, he spoke, "What can _I_ do?"

Michael's face flushed with heat, caught off-guard by the question, "I don't know... be here?"

The taller of the boys nodded. Thinking for a moment, he scooted behind the blanket pile and slowly wrapped his arms around it. Michael flinched in surprise of the contact, but soon melted into the touch.

"I can do that," he whispered.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, it is your local trans boy here. This was my first BMC fic! It's super short, I did it in one sitting (I plan to write longer trans Michael in the future), but I would love any type of comment! Thank you for reading!


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